You Lose Some, You Win Some

At the competition, I didn't finish in the top 4, so I'm not passing on to the next round. However, as a direct result of that 8 minute spot, I've got two more gigs.

One booking is from Bill Word, the producer of the comedy shows at Martini Blues. He's booked me to do a show for a couple's 25th Wedding Anniversary on June 28th. That's also my mom and dad's anniversary, which brought a lump in my throat when I got the booking. No need for details. If you know me very well, you'll know why.

The other booking is from Lynn Epstein, one of the comics who performed in the competition that same evening. She was one of the top 4 (I voted her #1 on my ballot), and books a room in Laguna Beach. I'll be there on July 13th.

Aside from the two gigs, I should also probably note that I felt good about the performance. It was all I could have hoped for... all any comic ever hopes for: laughs, applause breaks, connecting with the audience, being myself, improvising. It was my best set since returning to stand-up almost two years ago.

The only thing missing was enough votes to get into the top 4...

And money.

In fact, I ended-up paying to perform.

I was sitting with a couple of friends who'd made the long drive (thanks again, Alan and Mike!), and when the tab came, there were 3 cover charges. So, I paid $5 to perform. Not that I'm upset, mind you. Actually, I think it's funny. I didn't say anything to the waiter. The way I see it, the club owner and producer have a good thing going there, and I appreciate it. Normally, the pay-to-perform thing isn't something I condone. But in this case, I'll make an exception. For one thing, I think it may have been a mistake (since I wasn't sitting in the back of the room with the other comics). And even if it wasn't, I think $5 was a small price to pay for a fun evening, and a couple of unexpected bookings.

And remember, grasshopper, it's not about the money.

Not yet, anyway.

One of the mistakes I made "back in the day" (1986-1991) was that my primary focus was money. I worked on my act, and thought of myself as an artist, but my main target had to do with fame and fortune. I thought way too much about "How can I make a living at this?", as opposed to "How can I make myself better at this?". Even as I type this, something inside of me is rebelling, trying to tell me that I was really focused on getting better. Maybe. At times. But I still think that my striving for fame and fortune eventually overshadowed my onstage improvement. By the end of that "era", I wasn't having fun. Every showcase felt too damn important, which led me to being too uptight for them... and not doing as well as I was capable of doing. And on the rare instances when I did have a good showcase, I did nothing to nurture any business relationships that could have led to me making a living in showBUSINESS.

So remember, grasshopper... stay focused on being yourself, being good, and just plain being. Anything else is gravy. If fame and fortune happen, oh well. Fine. Take it. But don't dwell on it. That's a crapshoot at best. And we know that in a crapshoot, the house always wins in the long run. Not to mention the fact that the shooter isn't in control of the numbers on the dice.

Ah, to heck with the metaphors. Stay in the moment. Have fun. The end.